Flashback – Gold Tooth Stylie

I just got some money. The plan was simple.

Hop on the B41 and head downtown Brooklyn. Destination? The jewelry spot right across from Fulton Mall.

I was on a mission.

For what?

Today was the day I was supposed to meet the dude in the store to get the impressions taken for my gold teeth. Yup. Your boy Fresh wanted to come home and smile to his mom like this:


Saaaaay Cheeeeeeeeeeeeese!!!!

But mom wasn’t home yet. So I put my receipt on the kitchen counter and rolled back out the crib.

When I got home, from the minute I put my key in the door, all I could hear was this voice sounding pissed off, upset and getting increasingly louder. I’m thinking damn…who pissed ma dukes off today. It sounded something like this….

“Ahhh hell no little negro, you must have lost your last motherfuggin’ mind in here if YOU think, if YOU really truly think you about get some gold ass teeth. Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit, not as long as you under my motherfuggin’ roof….”

“But maaaa…..”

“Don’t but maaaaaaaa me. But maaaaaaa what? Huh? Fresh? What?  Let’s go. Right now. We goin’ back there now and get your money back…..I’m going with you…in case you try some slick shit cause you think you slick…..”

“But maaaaaa…..”

“I’m giving you two options. Either (a) we go down there now and get your money back or (b) you get your gold teeth and I’ll get your uncle to punch you right in the mouth………Which one is it?”

Guess who got their money back?

Years later, I got my mom back though. I came home from college one summer with a tattoo 🙂

*** Big ups to Just.-Ice***


~ by alwaysfunkyfresh on June 5, 2009.

7 Responses to “Flashback – Gold Tooth Stylie”

  1. Wow! What, praytell, made a young Fresh think that was a good idea?

  2. Somehow I knew this was going to end up a post! LMAO!!!! Fresh, was bout to get his ‘shine on’

  3. LMAO!!!!! Yo Latoya.. La la la la latoya!!!! hahahaaa that was the shiznit!!!

  4. Lots of money was spent in Eddie’s Gold Teeth during my high school days. Yes, that was the name of the shop. In Greenbriar Flea Market. LOL

  5. You busted out the Just Ice???? La-la-la latoya? WOW.

    Gold teeth? I am so glad your mom was around.

  6. lol I can’t believe you were about to get some “gold ass teeth” LOL! a MESS!!!!!

  7. Dayum~ She was going to get unc to knock your fronts out! This post was funny as heck 🙂

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