Will you marry me?

I read an article this morning that G.ilbert A.renas got his girlfriend to propose to him. He planned it….well…he tricked her into doing it. I think it was kind of funny, if you ask me. Read about it here http://my.nba.com/forum.jspa?forumID=400032200&start=0 and especially read the part about man law. Hilarious.

When I first saw the headlines, my thoughts were…GET THE FUGG OUTTA HERE….she proposed to him….damn that’s gusty….damn that $111. milli.on contract is pretty nice….then I read the story and realized he set her up. Good for you G.il. Congrats. He’s going marry the mother of his children. I like to hear stuff like that. Now just get that knee better and come back and help the Wiz win some damn games.

But it got me to thinking, what if he didn’t set her up? What if she really was the one to propose? It’s not a first. In fact it happened to someone I know. His girl straight up planned the whole night and at the end of the night, popped the question. He thought she was joking till she pulled out a ring FOR HIM!

Yikes! <- That was the first text message I got from him followed by a picture of the ring.

My response: OH SH*T!

It’s bad enough that it’s hard to find a man, so I hear, but to get actually get married?!?!? Some people feel they have a better chance at winning the lottery or seeing a unicorn or getting hit by a train and getting up and walking away with a scratch on your knee. But there’s a trend on the rise ladies and gentleman. More women are throwing tradition out the door and popping the question to their mate. There’s even articles on line that suggest how to do it. http://www.ehow.com/how_15099_propose-marriage-man.html

For sure, this would weed out the bullshitters in a relationship and is probably a good ass litmus test. Let’s say you’ve been with your dude for umm..5 years and he hasn’t popped the question yet but says all the right things. Drop on one knee (not both because he might think something else is about to happen!), pull out the ring and propose.  Either he’ll accept OR his ass will be out the door quick fast in a hurry on his cell phone talking his boys about “that chick is crazy”…Trust me.

Would a man feel less than a man if he was the one that got proposed too? Uhhh…YUP. He would get clowned by his boys FOR LIFE and you know this! “Did she get you a ring?” “Are you going to wear the dress at the wedding?” Ridicule central.  I’m sure women go through the same ridicule except, it’s probably not in their face. They get ridiculed behind their back by their girlfriends saying “he’s playing her. he’s not gonna marry her. she’s wasting her time”

Most women (I said most) are ready for marriage long before the dude even thinks about it. And when it does finally enter a guy’s mind, it sits in there for a while…marinating….simmering…..Then finally after he comes to grips with the concept, he’ll move forward.

So the question is would you propose to your man? Would you feel like less of a man if your woman proposed?

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~ by alwaysfunkyfresh on September 30, 2008.

11 Responses to “Will you marry me?”

  1. I am single. 29 and very single. I don’t think I would propose to a man. And if I did, SURELY would not buy him a ring. I wish you could see how scrunched up my face is right now. I would not be in relationship with someone for 5 dang years either. People have met, married, and divorced in that time. When you know what you want, you make that known and act accordingly. If you don’t know or its not what you want, you sit and languish and let it get away.

  2. Would I feel less of man? Nah. I find it empowering for her, actually. Because my girl had the balls… errr guts to ask me, shows me how strong she is. For me to be humble enough to accept it should show her that I am man enough to lower my pride for what’s best for us. Both of these demonstrate the strength of the unity.

    If however she’s constantly taking the lead, and I’m just following… well that opens a diff can of worms. As long as it works for those involves.

    HF

  3. I kinda like the traditional man-pops-the-question bit. But, if he stalls and I cant wait no mo, then one knee will be hittin tha flo fo sho! LMAO (I never talk like that!)

  4. I wouldn’t feel like any less of a man but I would be concerned that we aren’t on the same page. Is she asking me because she didn’t think I would ever get around to it? Seems like there should have been some serious discussions before it comes to that.

  5. Man I read that and fell out laughing!!!! I’m happy for him but that damn man law.. LOL as for asking a man.. Nah I won’t.. I’m ok being single for the rest of my life.. 🙂

  6. I’d have to be drunk, desperate, or having the best sex of my life before I broke down and asked a man to marry me. I’d always wonder what if I hadn’t…

  7. If I ever get married again… Ok, let’s stop right there. Not sure I’ll ever get married again, so, as one who’s been there and done that, my answer may seem a bit biased. As a woman in the process of a divorce, I can honestly say I’d NEVER propose to a man. Now, had you caught me before the marriage/divorce thing, I may have been all for it.

    I’m a very liberal, open-minded, empowered, 29 yr old chic but I still believe some gender ‘roles’ are valid/necessary/the foundation of our culture. The fact that we continue to ignore/change/blur/toss these roles w/each generation, I believe, contribute to the melt down of our culture. I’m not saying that a woman should be home cooking dinner and popping out babies while a man goes to work and bangs his secretary everyday. I AM saying that I’m the type of woman who believes a man should have somewhere to go everyday. What woman wants to come home from work and see her man sitting on the couch, playing video games, eating a bowl of cereal?

    Yes, I took it there. You may think I’ve gone too far, but I’m about to pull it back.

    My point is there’s a fine line between gender equality and letting a man be a man and a woman be a woman. (Program note: it’s perfectly alright for these lines to be blurred in the bedroom, i.e. a REAL woman likes/is good at/expects to be on top from time to time.) As before mentioned, my opinion may be jaded b/c I’m soon-to-be-divorced. It may also be reflective of the fact that I grew up with a father, not a baby daddy, but a real, bonafide, ol’ skool father who was married to my mother before I was born and who’s still married to her. So, as a girl raised as the apple of her father’s eye, there are certain things I expect from a man.
    1. I expect him to have a job, a gig, a goal…
    2. I expect him to ask my Daddy for my hand in marriage.
    3. He needs to be the one to propose.

    I don’t think that’s asking a lot. And, of course, this is just my opinion, but that’s just me.

    ’till next time…

  8. No, I would not ask a man to marry me. I wouldn’t even be with the type of man that wouldn’t want to ask a woman to marry him.

    I also believe that men need to be men and women need to stop trying to take over the man’s role in certain areas.

  9. I thought this was hysterical! Your story…the baller’s story, both gut shakin’ (disclaimer: Kisz really doesn’t have a “gut”).

    To answer your question, the possibility to propose has NEVER EVER even occurred to me. So my answer is no. I’m also pretty traditional regarding roles.

  10. Nope. I couldn’t.

  11. hell NAW

    if after all the hint dropping and the serious “how do you feel about marriage” convos dude still hasnt hit the dirt…then i’ll be out…

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