Father’s Day June 2008

This is one of those rare weekend posts I do – actually the way things have been lately this is one of those rare posts period.

Father’s Day was good, fairly quiet – just how I wanted it. A couple of cards, a couple of phone calls and I’m good.

Father’s Day is so funny though. The restaurants aren’t as crowded as on Mother’s Day. The commercials aren’t the same. They don’t advertise months in advance like they do for Mother’s Day. You’ll see these full page ads in the paper for the high end stores for mamas. Dads – we get the low budget dollar store advertisements or my favorite…..H.ome De.pot or L.owe.s or S.ears.

Look I know I’m a dude but how many sets of power tools and lawn mowers do I need? Damn……

But it’s all good. I take my accolades and appreciation and roll with it. You don’t want to man up and take care of yours, that’s on you.  A lot dudes get the role of fatherhood twisted and that’s a reason why I think there are so many “beefs” between parents.

Fatherhood doesn’t have shit to do with money. Dudes think they need to have money to have an impact on their child’s life. Some women think their child’s father ain’t shit because he doesn’t have money. Now granted, children aren’t cheap but still, fatherhood isn’t about just money.

It’s about presence.

Being around your child. Having your child know that you even exist. Talking to your child. That’s what it’s about.

You can’t just buy your kid a fresh new pair of J.ordans and think that every thing is every thing. Truthfully, my pops paid child support. I didn’t personally see the money myself. Hell I probably thought he was just a check 🙂  But if he would have showed up on his allotted weekends or called or made any type of effort to make contact, I wouldn’t have had so much resentment towards him as I grew older. (which I’m over now by the way)

On the flipside, ladies, it’s on you too. Don’t use the child as a scapegoat. I’m seeing more and more of this stuff lately. You know when you’re acting like an ass.

Children hold and remember your parental actions for life. Trust me. You think just because your shorty is 3 years old, they won’t know. I clearly remember my parents arguing. Clearly.

Sometimes you gotta learn to put your egos aside……….

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~ by alwaysfunkyfresh on June 16, 2008.

6 Responses to “Father’s Day June 2008”

  1. “It’s about presence.

    Being around your child. Having your child know that you even exist. Talking to your child. That’s what it’s about.”

    Say that again bruh. And Happy Father’s Day!

  2. You’re right…it is about presence and children DO remember the significant shit years and years later.

    My dad was ALWAYS around and treated me like a princess. Granted I didn’t come from a single parent home cause my parents were married til I was 17 but still…I remember so much from when I was little. Going places with him, following him around the house when I was like 3, watching basketball games with him and then saying “Isaiah Thompson is the best” over and over in preschool (ahahahaha) …that shit stands out and is important to me to THIS DAY.

  3. You are so right. It definitely is about presence. And my daughter’s father is finally realising that. I should print this and make him keep it.

  4. This sounds like my Father’s Day post. Happy Father’s Day to you Daddy Fresh. You are one of the ones holding it down.

  5. my mom always said she didn’t realize how much i was paying attention to their mess. mmm hmm. I’M WATCHIN YOU!! BOTH OF YOU!! but she was very very careful to not say bad things abt him and to make sure even after they separated and eventually divorced, we had a relationship w/him.

  6. Happy Father’s day to you 🙂 I’m glad you had a good one.. I FINALLY got my son’s father to see and understand this.. its not about MONEY its about time spent… teaching him things only a man can do! 🙂

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