Random Thoughts and Quotes

(not necessarily recent but they’ve popped in my head recently)

“Why do people wear their bluetooth headsets EVERYWHERE they go?” I mean, we’re in a club. The music is loud and this shit is attached to their ear. Take that shit off.

And while we’re in the club, can you please take off those damn sunglasses? Who the hell do you think you are?!?!?

The only reason why I spent 20 extra minutes on the treadmill AFTER my workout was done is because the girl with the CRAZY booty was on the stair machine in front of me. Beauty in motion.

But really, I used to be a breast man but I think I’m being converted to the backsides…

No seriously, I don’t care how much ass and breasts you have, I could never get down with you if there was no intellectual stimulation.

Damn, she was over 30 and couldn’t even kiss. She attacked my gums.

Aye Pappi….

Listen I don’t even do this but something about you. You’re different…

I spend WAAAAAAAAAAAY too much time on the internet. It’s an addiction. It’s the legal version of crack.

She said she wanted to see what it looked like. So I took a picture for her.

Whenever I see a weird couple, I immediately start thinking shit like either he’s got money or he’s fucking it right. Never ever do I think it has to do with love.

Do porn stars get tired of fucking?

Ahhh, now I see why they call her Superhead

Some people take this Halloween shit a little too far….just a little

So you have to use the bathroom, really bad, maybe it’s a case of the bubble guts – who knows. How come your body seems to know EXACTLY when you put the key in your door ?!?!?! You feel like you’re about to EXPLODE.

Man, I know y’all fucking. You ain’t foolin’ nobody. All the signs are there, so stop tryin’ to play it off around me.

And no, don’t worry, I won’t tell your girl.

And uhh, yeah, nah, don’t worry, I won’t tell your man either. 😉 But uhh, don’t you think it’s strange that you both used me as a scapegoat Saturday night.…I’m just saying….

I would take Buckeey over Deelishis anyday (can you tell I’ve watched Flava of Love?)

I wouldn’t touch New York if I had 8 foot long dick.
She’s got serious issues and she just seems fake to me. I hate phony women.

I wonder how Chuck D feels about all of this….Yes, the rhythm, the rebel….

How come this show seems mad Jerry Springer-ish?!?!?!?

You ain’t even call me back after all I’ve done. That’s some real ungrateful shit right there.

Yep, I know she’s cute but she’s also about to turn 20 and that my friend would make you R. Kelly

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~ by alwaysfunkyfresh on October 30, 2006.

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